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Thursday, October 14, 2010

my explosion at chase bank

so yesterday I had a crazy preggo hormonal meltdown. It started in the morning when my older brother's erstwhile girlfriend messaged me on facebook to say congratulations. Which was nice, but if she knew, then my older brothers must have known, so why haven't I heard from anyone? I know I should have called the boys myself, but I didn't know my dad would be on the horn that same day spreading the news far and wide. I sort of thought I'd get to tell the boys myself, and if not at least I'd get to talk to them about it at Mark's wedding this weekend. So it was weird to get congratulations from Joe's exgirlfriend before I heard anything from Joe. So then I called my dad to find out just who he had spread the news to, "have you told Aunt Judy?" I asked. His verbatim reply: "Honestly, I told so many people I can't remember who all I talked to." wow.

So apparently everyone knows. weird. Actually I'm a little touched. If he's telling all our relatives it must be because he's excited, right? right. I think that's cute. Then he told me that he picked my doctor (the same doctor who delivered me 26 years ago) and that I needed to call him ASAP. I think he was confused when I said I already had both a midwife and an obstetrician. "a woman?" he asked incredulously.

I've learned, finally many years later after a turmultuous adolescence, that the key to talk to my dad is just to "yes" everything. "yes, i'll call dr. ettner" "yes, I'll let you pick the god parents" "yes of course O knows he has to defer to you in all childrearing issues." I just "yes" my way through every conversation. At first it was difficult to learn because you have to surrender a bit of pride, but then I realized that it made my relationship with him much easier and he often doesn't remember specific conversation or really try and enforce things the way he used to. So it works out in the end.

So anyway, I was kind of bummed that my brothers couldn't even text me to say congrats, but it wasn't a huge deal. O and I have been kind of having a hard time with friends of ours who are trying to have a baby and (understandably) were disappointed by our news. I get it, I've been there. It's fine, I'll get over it. So my point is that all these things were adding up to get me all wild around the eye.

I decided to take the twins I nanny to this playground cafe so that they could run around and I could sit quietly on a big easy chair, read magazines, and drink decaf lattes. So I waited til they woke up from their nap, dressed them, packed them into the car, got them all excited about play cafe, and then once I'd ordered my latte and told the attendent to charge me for 2 kids my debit card got declined. OH SHIT. panic.

O and I just joined this high interest savings credit union with the intention of saving some money. We carefully took into account all of our bills and expenses and decided we could affored to put $300 into the credit union each month. BUT in my weird unattached pregnancy brain I forgot to factor our gym membership into the budget. So they just took out $130 causing us to be overwithdrawn by $60. SHIT. Then I remembered that in my exhaustion over the weekend I never deposited my paycheck from friday which is still sitting on the dining room table in one of the stacks of papers. shit shit shit.

So the twins and I drive over to my house and I leave them in the car while I dart upstairs, grab my money, and head back down. by this time the kids are understandably PISSED. I promised them play cafe and instead we're running a bunch of errands and I'm noticibly cranky. So I get to the bank and the kids are just in foul moods, whining, destroying things, rolling around on the floor. It is not fun. And the bank is REALLY backed up for 3:00 on a wednesday. I wait in line 15 minutes for the one available window even though there are greeters and bankers behind desks and tells behind closed windows. The one teller who has her window open looks terrified and all of 16. she must be new. Which is probably why it's taking so long. She fucked up the guy in front of me's deposit and seemed confused when I handed her $200 cash and a deposit slip. "Do you have your ID?" she asked. Weird that I need ID to make a DEPOSIT but whatever, I slip it under the window and try my best to corral the kids. "Um, your balance is negative..." "I know, that's why I'm depositing cash." "Oh, just checking."

Then while at least 6 other bankers stand around doing bullshit she tells me her computer just froze and she needs to call the helpline. It will take a few minutes.

I felt like a volcano. I literally saw red. And exploded. Can any of these other people who are doing nothing take a cash deposit? no. of course not. so I said some horrible things, vowed to never come back, and dragged the twins (one of whom was hiding the courtesy bowl of candy under her jacket) out to the car.

sheesh.

I'm not someone who emotes in public, I rarely if ever have yelled at service employee. I don't knwo what came over me. I literally was seeing red.

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